From Dreams to REALITY!!

Okay, I say "reality", but the reality right now is that I only have 4 HPT's*** to confirm that this is actually happening.


***You read it right - I said FOUR.  See, the first was one of a box of two - I had taken the first one a few months ago (neg of course), the 2nd was taken later the night that I found out, and of course the next morning I had to take the other one in that box just to be sure I wasn't dreaming.  Oh, and the 4th I took this morning (yup, 5 days after having 3 positive tests).  This wasn't so much because I needed reassurance that I was still pregnant, but because all of the other tests I had taken were blue and I wanted a pink one.  I mean, what if Baby Sac is a girl and one day she looks through her baby book and wonders why all the tests are blue and none are pink??  If she's anything like me (which, she undoubtedbly will be - blonde curls, blue eyes and a love for all things heels and handbags) she'll definitely ask.  I know I would.
Anyway, I always loathed the girls who posted the pictures of their pregnancy tests - I mean, the creation of life is beautiful, but let's be honest, it begins with pee on a stick.  With that said, I'm now officially one of those girls and this is MY blog ;)  So here's a picture of the greatest Christmas gift I've ever received.

So where do I begin?  Andrew and I have been trying not protecting against it since November of last year.  I had an ovarian cyst and since I was already married and the pill made me feel like Medusa (with better hair, of course), I ditched my prescription and I've been BC-free ever since.  We took the 'whenever it happens, it happens' approach, but after reading that most couples get pregnant within 7-12 months of not being on the pill - even when they're not "trying", coupled with the fact that my friends (my best friend, to be exact) was due in August and what seemed like everyone around me (literally everyone - I even made a list one day - 22!!) was pregnant, I was really getting the baby itch.  Honestly, I've wanted a baby since I was little and the second Pastor Jody said "I now pronounce you Man and Wife" - I was ready.  Sporadic periods and MANY negative pregnancy tests went by and nothing.

In October I had my annual with Dr. Belle (my amazing, hilarious and AWESOME Jamaican OBGYN),  where again I was late.  Like 3 weeks late.  And had completely missed all of September.  I was totally prepared excited for her to tell me that the HPTs were a fluke and I was indeed prego!  But instead she told me I wasn't ovulating...and I would have trouble conceiving.  Considering I had psyched myself into thinking I would be walking out of that appointment with an ultrasound picture and instead walking out with infertility articles, pamphlets, a prescription for Clomid, and even a number to the sperm doctor for Drew (complete with a humiliating plastic cup for him), I was incredibly let down. 


I bawled, I sulked, I had totally convinced myself that motherhood was just not in the cards for me and I was destined to be the childless lady who spoiled all of my friends kids (don't worry Ava and Damon - Aunt Lindsey will always do that!!).  But thankfully, my momma had enlisted the mighty prayers of her friends and I have amazing friends and family that I had shared this news with that also comitted to praying for me - and God lifted my spirits and I finally started feeling better. 

"If we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently".

~Romans 8:25

The Mack Family cruise, which had been scheduled for an entire year, was fast approaching and Drew and I made a pact to not talk anything 'baby' for the rest of the year and just enjoy ourselves on the cruise and the holiday season with all of the food, fun and drinks there was to offer.  And that's exactly what we did!!  Best decision ever!  We sailed away, loved paradise and the time with our family and returned back home Christmas Eve. 


That's when it happened - after realizing that I was late (no big deal since that was pretty much the norm) and almost passing out in Target (I first thought it was just the "day before Christmas, packed out store, freaking LONG lines, moody shopper" thing getting to me) - I pulled out the infamous 2nd of a 2-pack box stick and thought, 'why not'.  While Drew was in the shower getting ready to leave for Daddy and Trig's Christmas Eve service at church, I gave it a whirl.  I was so used to seeing negatives that I put it on the side of the counter and actually forgot about it as I did my makeup.  As I sat to curl my eyelashes (side note: ladies, if you don't use an eyelash curler, do yourself a favor!  It instantly opens your eyes right up!) I glanced down and had to blink a few times to make sure I was actually seeing what I thought I saw...could that be!?  A YES!?!  IT'S A CHRISTMAS MIRACLE!!  I stood gobsmacked for a minute ot two, then ran downstairs to grab whatever tissue paper I could find (sorry I there was no tissue paper in your gift, daddy...it was put to good use though!) I wrapped up the test and put it in a wine gift bag (dont judge me - it was the first thing I saw that didn't already have a present in it!)  By this time Drew was out of the shower and as soon as I had my "gift" ready, I handed it to him.  Right then and there, standing in front of the washing machine in a towel, Drew found out we were pregnant!!  We danced around and laughed and even cried a little.  I just couldn't believe this was happening.  I still can't.


I took the 2nd test when we got to Daddy and Trig's house after church - and couldn't hold it in - I totally spilled the beans when we were done opening presents.  The next morning I took the 3rd test, you know, just for good measure :) and it being Christmas Day, we told my momma and that side of my family, as well as Drew's immediate family since they were all together.  What a PERFECT Christmas gift!!


The past week has been full of Googling, blog-reading, online article browsing and basically driving myself nuts in every way, shape and form possible.  My first doctor's appointment is scheduled for Tuesday, 1/3 @ 10:30am and I'm counting down the hours.  I can't shake the nerves - I just want to know that everything is perfect and this baby is where it should be and growing strong.  Me being the control freakshow that I am, I know this isn't going to be the most stress-free 9 months ever.  But I'm excited.  And ready.  And so blessed.

"For this child I prayed and the LORD has granted me what I asked of Him".

~1 Samuel 1:27

(Andrew and I on Christmas Eve, our first picture taken after finding out we're going to be parents!!)